Today, in the studio of the show 'With an Open Heart' in News24, the story of a 39-year-old woman, mother of three daughters aged 23, 20 and 15, was told. A painful story, full of trials and sacrifices, that begins with two failed marriages and ends in a constant battle to regain control of her life. She has two daughters from her first marriage, and another daughter from her second. But beyond the numbers and years, a difficult reality is hidden, violence and psychological pressure have been present in both marriages, forcing the 39-year-old to end these relationships through divorce.
The wounds do not end here. After the second divorce, the two minor daughters were separated from their mother and placed in a children's home, based on a consensus between her and the relevant institutions, with the hope that this would be a temporary solution until she recovered. But time passed and things did not go as planned.
Today, one of the girls has turned 18 and has left the orphanage to start her own life. While the other girl, only 15 years old, is currently in the "Zyber Hallulli" Shelter, continuing to remain under institutional care. The woman told the show of moderator and journalist Evis Ahmeti about her long ordeal of suffering.
"I come from a family with many children. We are 7 children, 3 sisters and 4 brothers, my parents divorced. When I was a teenager I fell in love at the age of 16. At 17 I became a mother. My family accepted my relationship. We lived together for about 4-5 months and then we decided to start a family. When the daughter was born, I went and lived near my mother. After the birth of the daughter, he started drinking. When the other daughter was born, he started to be violent. He didn't care about us, about the girls. So I decided to go to my mother. There I didn't find a field of flowers. He also gambled. After two years of separation, I filed for divorce. When the lady from Switzerland found out that I was divorced, she accommodated me there. As soon as the children grew up a little, I started working. It continued like that and I filed for divorce. The court left my children to me. The gentleman did not contribute anything to raising the children, it was 50 thousand old lek for each one. girl.
He never gave that money. I went to the bailiff's office several times, and I even contacted him and he said; do whatever you want, you took it over. He never met the girls once. He said; when I don't have eyes, I don't need eyebrows. I have a very good relationship with both girls. When the girls were 9-10 years old, it was my birthday at that time and they said to me; 'mom, we don't have money to give you a gift'. I told them; 'mom, I don't want a gift. The best gift for mom is for you to meet your father'. I feel guilty about this. I took the girls there myself. He got married again, he has a son. I took the girls, and I even respected his son. As the girls told me, his wife treated them very badly and called me at 2 am (she said a bad expression that for ethical reasons she didn't mention on TV).
The reason for the second marriage was a friend of mine. But he had mental health problems. Now he had problems and was hospitalized. I asked him for help and he answered me. I rented a house and lived with the girls. When I needed him, he was near us. In this rented house, because I knew who the owner of the house was. I took it without a contract. The gentleman came to me late at night and tried to sexually harass me and I kicked him out. The next morning, I left for work early. Then I reported him. But his relatives threatened me. Then I backed down from the threat. We found ourselves in the middle of the road. Some police officers I was with in that city suggested that I take the girls there until you sort things out and then take them. I had the eldest daughter with my people. The second daughter was in third grade, the third in first grade. During this period when I took the house and started working, I got a certificate and took it to him. Every time I went to work, I would come to the girls before the schedule, meet them. Every time I wanted to pick up the girls, the municipality would give me an excuse. I tried to do self-justification. Nothing could happen to my girls. I would also take the girls home in the summer. I had positive reviews. We both went together to pick up the girl. When the second girl turned 15, they asked to transfer her to Shkodra. I had everything, with a rental contract and a job.
The institution had influenced the girl at that age to decide. She jumped off the wall and came to my house. There was a meeting of the municipality and they told me that 'the girl should go there once to Shkodra and then we will return her'. But they never returned her. During this period when the girl was left alone here, I had intensive meetings with her. The institution here should have notified 6 months in advance. But they notified me in the last hours. They tell me; we will transfer the girl to Tirana. I say; give me the girl at home. The second girl from Shkodra had left. Why don't you give me? I said; monitor me. The girl is about 6 months old. I couldn't leave, but I went after 10 days. When the second girl had gone there, she had told me; they give me medicine, but I don't take it. She left the institution and called me. She told me; I am in the middle of Tirana. I told her to stay there, and I took the other girl there. She took her to the institution. "The director of the institution told me; the girl came with a glass, she tried to hurt herself," the woman confessed through tears.
